ANOTHER DAY AT THE RANCH

I saw the bag of sunflower seeds today that I bought before Lucy went to Poland last year.. It's in the same place I put it back in August of 2010, not opened.. If you know me, you know I've eaten sunflower seeds since I was in junior high sometime.. To me eating sunflower seeds was on equal to trying smoking.. I remember buying a little paper baggie from the drugstore. They were fifteen cents each.. I bought one and went up by the school and put some in my mouth.. That was it, I was hooked and since then had a habit of eating sunflower seeds that would become epic in the amount I could eat in a week.. Fast forward to last year, eleven months ago.. Actually maybe the two years prior to that day if February.. I had a few bouts with what I think were kidney stones.. After the last one I swore to drink water regularly.. And did, or thought I did and was doing fine.. Then Memorial day weekend of 2009 I got nailed with one and strangely enough it was sort of bad but wasn't too much of a problem.. I just wasn't feeling that good.. Then one night as I was pissing there was a splash and the flow stopped.. I looked and there was what looked like a small watermelon seed in the bottom of the bowl.. "Yikes, did I just pass that through there?" .. A little nervous about my next urination process but an hour later I peed no problem..

Fast forward to eleven months ago.. And up until then I was still eating sunflower seeds maybe I'd cut back a bit but.. It was the Monday after the super bowl give or take, I woke up with a slight back ache, nothing too severe.. I drink a glass of water every morning and did that day as well.. Ate breakfast then took a shower.. Before I got in the shower my back was now a full blown painful situation.. Bad enough to where I took a pain pill of moms (prescription type) and figured that would stop the pain eventually.. I drank another glass of water once I got out of the shower.. Then I went to the rocking chair to rock (message) the inner organs.. I had done this before several times and it usually worked. Mom was ready to go to work so I took her in.. On the way down I know I've got sweat starting to roll down my forehead.. We get to her work place and she gets in and as soon as I pull away I get all the windows rolled down, I was hot and worse in pain.. I took the netflix discs to the post office, why I don't know but as I pass the turn to go to the hospital I think seriously about making that turn.. I get the discs dropped at the post office then head for home.. I don't usually come home while she is at work but this day I needed to.. I get home and drink more water.. I took two more of those pain pills and then tried for the next two hours to stay awake.. either the pain was about to knock me out or the overdose was.. Not sure which.. But from nine that morning until three in the afternoon I wouldn't use the bathroom.. At noon I'm seriously thinking about calling my older brother to go get mom and bringing her home, I couldn't see driving in the state I was in.. One o'clock, either shit or get off the pot.. I was at the cutoff point to go get her.. I looked at the internet and decided to go to walmart and get flac seed and another supplement.. I was sweating and more than likely looked like an addict in that store.. If I would have seen me I would have thought I looked strange.. My back hurt in the eleven range and I felt like I had a serious case of the flu.. (addiction) I got what I was in there for and then went over to where mom was working and sat and waited.. I kept hoping she would either be early or as the clock got to two that she would be on time.. She would be twenty minutes over. Thankfully she wanted to come strait home, no argument from me.. By the time we were two miles from home she leaned over to me and said "are you feeling ok?" and I simply said no.. Nothing else was said.. I get in the house and for the next hour, twenty hours (felt like) it was a struggle and then the urge hit, I had to pee.. The dam was broken.. The longest six hours of pain in my life.. The siege was over.. That scared me enough to where I stopped eating sunflower seeds almost completely.. I have eaten three mouthfuls this past year and the last being in August.. I miss them but I haven't had an attack sine then but I am sure I will have another sometime and it might be what kills me.. Yeah I'm that dead set against seeing a doctor that I will have to be dead to be taken to see one.. Nearly dead, or incompasitated...


BH